Supporting Your Teen Who May be Struggling with Depression

When a teen is struggling with depression, it can be confusing and painful for both them and the people who care about them. The signs aren’t always obvious, and knowing how to respond can feel overwhelming. Here are some ways to recognize depression in teens and support them with compassion and care.

What Depression Can Look Like in Teens

Depression often shows up differently in adolescents than in adults. In addition to persistent sadness, watch for: 

  • Irritability or anger instead of obvious sadness 

  • Social withdrawal — pulling away from friends, family, or activities they once enjoyed 

  • Changes in sleep — sleeping much more or less than usual 

  • Appetite or weight changes 

  • Loss of motivation — declining grades, missing assignments, or giving up on hobbies 

  • Physical complaints like headaches or stomachaches with no clear medical cause 

A key sign is that these changes last for at least two weeks and interfere with daily life. 

Start Gentle, Non-Judgmental Conversations

Choose a calm moment and speak with warmth, avoid accusatory language. You might say: 

“I’ve noticed you’ve seemed down and tired lately. I care about you and want to understand what you’re going through.” 

Avoid minimizing (“Everyone feels sad sometimes”) or jumping straight to solutions. Listen first. 

Validate Their Experience 

Let your teen know their feelings are real and not their fault. Simple affirmations —“I believe you,” “You don’t have to go through this alone”—can be powerful. 

Support Daily Well-Being

 While professional care is essential, small everyday actions help: 

  • Predictable routines: regular meals, bedtime, and wake times 

  • Gentle activity: walks, stretching, or any movement they tolerate 

  • Low-pressure connection: shared meals, watching a show together, short check-ins without demanding conversation 

  • Screen boundaries: encourage breaks from social media if it seems to worsen mood 

Take Care of Yourself, Too 

Supporting a depressed teen can be emotionally draining. Reach out for your own support — trusted friends, a parent support group, or a therapist. Caring for yourself models healthy coping and gives you the strength to stay present.

Supporting a teen through depression takes patience, presence, and help from others. You don’t have to have all the answers — you just have to be willing to notice, listen, and walk alongside them. Small, steady steps can make a big difference, especially when paired with professional support.

Liz Langley, MSW, LCSW

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