A Little Background on the Nervous System
Your nervous system is the body’s built-in alarm and navigation system. It constantly scans your environment, deciding whether you’re safe, unsafe, or in need of rest. Most of the time, this happens without you even noticing — but when you start paying attention, you’ll see that your nervous system is always sending you signals. The trick is learning how to listen.
When You Feel On Edge (Fight or Flight Mode)
Ever notice your heart racing, your jaw tightening, or your thoughts speeding up? That’s your sympathetic nervous system switching on, preparing you to do something about a perceived threat. Even if the “threat” is just an inbox full of emails, your body reacts as if a bear just walked into the room.
It’s telling you: “I don’t feel safe.”
How to respond: Practice slow extended exhales, take a short walk, or do something rhythmic (like tapping or stretching) to signal that you’re not in danger.
When You Feel Numb or Shut Down (Freeze or Collapse Mode)
Sometimes the nervous system decides, “This is too much, I’m out.” You might feel heavy, disconnected, or like you can’t move forward. This is the dorsal vagal response — your body’s way of protecting you by shutting things down.
It’s telling you: “I’m overwhelmed.”
How to respond: Start small. Gentle movement (like standing up, rolling your shoulders, or stepping into sunlight) can slowly bring your system back online.
When You Feel Calm and Connected (Safe Mode)
This is the sweet spot — the ventral vagal state, you may have heard it referred to as “window of tolerance” Here, you feel grounded, engaged, and capable of handling what life throws at you. Your body is relaxed, your breath is steady, and connecting with others feels natural.
It’s telling you: “I feel safe.”
How to respond: Enjoy it. Strengthen this state by savoring moments of calm, connecting with people who feel good to be around, and practicing gratitude.
This Matters
Your nervous system isn’t “good” or “bad.” It’s protective. It’s working to keep you safe, even if it sometimes overreacts. By tuning into its signals, you can respond with curiosity.