Helping Kids Slow Down When Life Speeds Up
In today’s world, everything is fast-paced and nonstop. This applies to kids too, not just adults.
So, what does that mean for back to school?
When school starts, there is often less sleep, more stress, an increase in social pressures, and little opportunity to escape without risking grades dropping or social connections being impacted. So how do we help our kids slow down when we don’t always get that chance as adults either?
The good news is that regulation does not have to mean adding another big task to the schedule. Sometimes, it can look like building small moments of connection into things you are already doing.
Here are a few ways you and your kids can slow down and co-regulate together.
Make Family Dinner an Activity
One way to slow things down is to make one night a week family dinner night. Not just eating dinner together either. Try rotating who picks the meal and helps cook it.
This naturally asks adults to slow down to maintain safety while kids slow down to learn or try something new. Letting them decide what to make can also create more engagement because there is more buy-in for them to get involved.
After finishing the meal, before sitting down to eat, ask everyone what they are noticing physically right now.
Are you hungry? Do you feel low energy? Is your mouth watering from smelling the food you just worked so hard on?
These little check-ins help kids practice noticing what is happening in their bodies without making it feel like a formal exercise.
Making this routine once a week, or even once a month, creates intentional time to slow down. It also shows your kids that even when life is busy, we can make time to take care of ourselves.
Try Beading Together
Another way to calm down and connect is to bead!
It really doesn’t matter what you make. It could be a necklace, keychain, or even just a string of beads, but getting small beads is a must.
Have you ever tried beading with small beads? It takes stillness, concentration, and so much patience.
While beading, ask your kiddo how they are doing. Make conversation around what you are noticing yourself and see if they can connect with that too.
Have you had to start over yet? How does your back feel after being bent over like that? Are your hands tired?
Then, after you both are finished, use that as an opportunity to notice what your bodies need next. Stretch, shake out your arms, stand up, or walk around for a minute.
This is a great way to slow down while also noticing and releasing some of the tension or stress left over from the day.
Have a Dance Party
Lastly, have a dance party.
Now, this sounds like the opposite of calming down. However, this can be a great activity when you know things have been crazy, but you notice your kid still has a lot of energy and doesn’t quite know what to do with it.
Grab a Bluetooth speaker and put it wherever you already are. If you are cooking, put it in the kitchen. If you are folding laundry, put it in the laundry room.
Find a playlist both you and your kids can agree on and let the music lead your body for a few moments of silly dancing.
Dancing gives kids a physical outlet while also letting them be silly and free. Once you both are adequately out of breath, take a moment to stretch, lay on the floor, or drink some ice-cold water.
Then check in again.
Do you feel different now than before we started? What was your favorite dance move I did? What was your favorite dance move you did?
Use the activity to explore together what movement can do for our bodies and minds.
Regulation Can Happen in Small Moments
No matter what you do to spend time grounding yourself and your family, remember that this is a shared experience.
Most families struggle with the transition back to school and can feel the stress, which means our kids can feel it too.
Helping kids regulate does not always require a perfectly calm house, a long mindfulness exercise, or another thing added to the schedule. Sometimes it looks like cooking together, focusing on a handful of beads, dancing in the kitchen, or simply taking a moment to notice how everyone feels.
Take the time you can to show your kids what regulation can look like and that it doesn’t have to take long to feel more mindful, connected, and present.